There is almost nothing than I miss more than travel. Really, I mean that. My heart yearns to get the fuck outta dodge. I recognize that some have felt comfortable traveling during this time and it is not my intention to shame you. It is a choice that I’ve made for a variety of reasons.
I actually recently encouraged a friend to go away for a few days. She was very concerned about her safety but even more concerns about the options. She didn’t want people thinking she’s a terrible person, particularly as she’s been a bit more conservative this whole time. To give a bit of background, she has crippling seasonal affective disorder. She is generally very depressed when the winter hits and when you throw into the mix isolation and the stress of everything else we are all facing (i.e. employment challenges, concern for personal health, etc.), she was fighting an uphill battle nearly every day. This is not where I lecture you, advising that you can only travel if absolutely necessary for mental or physical health reasons. This is background, so you understand the discussion that she and I had.
I advised her that while traveling was not something I am currently doing, it is my understanding that many have traveled safely and thus, she could easily follow in their footsteps. Of course, I was writhing with jealousy as I shared this advice. I don’t want to get into my super personal feelings on this for fear of stirring up a debate that I am not in the mood to have and that doesn’t get to the heart of THIS matter.
I think that travel is good for the soul. I really do. Whenever folks have told me that they can’t afford to travel, I always suggest thinking outside of the box. Travel does not have to be exotic or dramatic, at all. Travel is a change of scenery, a shift in perspective. If I’ve learned anything during this time, that has been made more apparent to me. Travel can mean getting in your car and driving a half hour or an hour away. Travel can mean going to a park or a beach or waterside somewhere. Travel is changing your background for a few minutes or a few days or a few weeks. There are no hard and fast rules and that is something I love about travel.
Yes, I’ve traveled to some extremely exotic places and I am super grateful for those opportunities. However, I am still a firm believer in the point that travel is not a one size fits all situation. In fact, sometimes we can’t leave at all. Not a half hour away, not an hour away, not at all. There are folks who are afraid of air travel, get car sick, are immune compromised, can’t be in the sun, have dependents they can’t really pick up a go, etc. So, what then?
Well, there are a million other ways to travel. This is going to sound trite and cheesy but I swear it comes from the heart and I’ve lived this in the last year or so. I think we can travel through media, movies and videos. I think we can travel through literature. I think we can travel by planning trips for when our circumstances change.
I don’t believe that travel should be used as a total escape mechanism. What do I mean by that? Well, I’ve heard people say (including myself) that they just want to pack up and go. Right. It’s nice to have a break sometimes, to be able to reset and regroup and start over. However, there is no running away from your problems or difficult situations. When you come back, whether it’s minutes, days, weeks, months or years from your departure, that shit will be awaiting your return. If you don’t return, the thing(s) will find a sneaky way of finding you wherever you are, and I guarantee that.
Travel should not be seen as a way to avoid or forget. Travel should be viewed as a breath. A nice deep breath. I was listening to a lecture last week by Rabbi Steve Leder and he said something along the lines of ‘I don’t know who discovered the water, but it wasn’t the fish.’ What does that mean? Well, when we are in the throes of something, it’s often impossible to see it for what it really is. We feel lost, swirling along with the tide, and we are more in survival mode than anything else. It takes pulling ourselves out of the depths to really obtain the necessary perspective to figure out what to do next.
I know that watching a movie or reading a book only transports you somewhere for a hot minute, but isn’t it worth that minute? Isn’t it meaningful to give yourself a little break. Isn’t it meaningful to allow your heart and breath to slow enough so that you can rationally approach all the shit you have to deal with?
The truth is that I can’t wait to get on an airplane again to travel to foreign and fantastic destinations. I can’t, but it’s not something I’m going to do right now. Right now I’m going to find ways to give myself the peace of travel within the world that I’m living in. I’m going to drive mid-state to hike in a beautiful and quiet park. I’m going to drive to the beach to walk along the boardwalk. I’m going to drive out East to check out some wineries. I’m going to sort out for myself how to shift my perspective in the best way I can. That break, that time, that effort, will reward you back tenfold if you make the investment.
I guarantee you that you will feel lighter and more joyful if you just allow yourself a time out. This is not lip service. I know that many of you barely have a few minutes to yourself. Take a guided meditation for five minutes before bed. Take a 10 minute bike ride or walk. It doesn’t need to be long or expensive. Invest in yourself and an adventure because I know it’s what your soul needs. We all need to feel like we have somewhere to go when our existing environment feels tough or toxic.
I got a friend flowers the other day. She’s quite pregnant and immune compromised and isn’t going much of anywhere anytime soon. You know what I gave her? An escape. She can look at those pretty, vibrant blooms and allow her mind to wander for a few minutes. She gets a breath of fresh air while staying safe as can be. Be creative, think big, act small, have courage.
L.
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