A List of Truths.

Hi. Are we frustrated yet? I hope not. I do find that when I’ve broached this topic with friends, they get a little touchy. I get it. I do. It’s hard to deal with. We talk so much about being real and being the most authentic version of ourselves, but most of us don’t even know what that means.

We spend so much time trying to prove something to other people. We want to prove to them that we are _____________ (fill in the blank). Why? 

I want to share a few intrinsic truths with you. I promise you that even though these are undeniably my truths, I also believe them to be fairly universal. Are you ready?

1. At the end of the day, even the people who love you most in the world don’t like one thing about you.
2. At the end of the day, the thing that you most dislike about yourself, at least one person likes. 
3. You were born flawed, you will die flawed, you will live your life trying to be perfect. 
4. You will never be perfect.
5. You are the best version of yourself when you accept who you are as you are.
6. You are also the best version of yourself when you strive to be a better person.
7. You should care how you treat other people and how they treat you.
8. You should not care what other people think of you.
9. You should live each day like it’s your last.
10. You should live each day like you have a trillion more.
11. You should understand that owning your story is the best way to avoid making the same mistakes you’ve made.
12. You need to know that anything you’ve done that is considered a mistake is actually a lesson to be learned.
13. When we do the same things over and over again to harm ourselves, it’s not just ‘who we are’ and tough shit it’s a habit that’s begging to be broken.
14. Hate should be reserved for dictators and mass murderers, not exes.
15. Indifference is the opposite of love, not hate.
16. You once loved the person you claim to hate.
17. The person you claim hates you or never loved you once cared about you on some level, even if it was just an ego stroke or a base attraction.
18. If you do not love yourself, you will never be truly loved by anyone else, and even if you are, you will never be able to experience it in a pure and real way.
19. We change all the time.
20. We mostly stay the same.
21. We lie a lot and most of our lies have to do with fear.
22. We are scared to be honest with other people for what they will think of us.
23. People think worse of our lies than our truths, no matter how unlikeable those truths are at the end of the day.
24. We need other people.
25. We need to love ourselves.
26. We need other people who understand how to love us and respect how we love ourselves.
27. If someone is okay with your self-loathing, they don’t really care about you in the way that you deserve to be cared about.
28. The world is a cold place sometimes.
29. The world can be a wonderful place.
30. The world is often a scary place.
31. We can combat our fears by understanding what really scares us.
32. We should never fear losing people because nothing we hold onto that tightly is going to be forever, nothing.
33. The thing we don’t fear losing is the realest thing we have in our lives.
34. We should never (I rarely use that word, so pay attention, please) expect others to care as little for us as we may care for ourselves. If you reject someone for caring more about you than you care for yourself, this is just another act of violence against you, plain and simple.
35. No other human is a solution to any problem in our lives.
36. You cannot run away from your problems because issues have a funny way of finding us in the dark.
37. People say that you can’t pick who you love. I disagree. You may fall in love with someone without intending to, but you can certainly choose whether you stick around or not. The knowledge that the decision is actively yours is an act of freedom and release in itself. Give yourself that gift, every damn day.
38. If you think someone is dishonest with you consistently, it’s best to remove that person from your life or accept when they offer that to you. Even if they aren’t, that foundation as a belief is a pox and a threat. Nothing good will come of that relationship. Nothing.
39. It is not an act of rebellion to be true to who you are and live life as your most authentic self.
40. If your most authentic lifestyle includes harm coming to people around you, I would encourage you to take stock. Maybe you’ve turned into something else entirely to protect yourself.
41. No one is worth giving up your sweetness for, no one.
42. When you are harmed, it is temping to hurt someone else to feel better. Resist the urge because you won’t feel better and you will have harmed someone else.
43. Do all the things in spite of your fears. You’ll be better for it, I promise.
44. When you are afraid, it helps to say it out loud. To someone else. Sometimes it helps to tell a stranger. Someone is helps to tell someone you trust. It is not stupid or silly. It is real, get it out, move beyond it. That is healing. That is growth. That is self-love. 
45. No matter how hurt I am, I always believe in love. I encourage you to do the same. Love comes in so many different forms. No one is worth resigning that card or idea.
46. Life is worth living, no matter what. 
47. You are worthy of love.
48. You will likely need to grow to understand how to be worthy of love.
49. You need to grow. Your cup should never be full.
50. You are worthy. You are worthy. You are worthy.

Good weekend all. So much love, from imperfect and harmed me, to imperfect and harmed you.

x

L.