THE Straw.

Hi there. Welcome to…not Monday. Shall we continue?

Okay, we have a paintbox that’s missing a color. So what? So what or more like oh, that sucks big time? Well, I guess that depends on your general and overall outlook. Right? Are you more flexible or less so? You know what I’m asking you, don’t you? Do you sweat the small stuff? 

Speaking of the small stuff, let’s dip back into that pot, shall we? We are going to revisit and expand on the concept that in life, the smallest changes can have the biggest impact. This is true whether you are a reactive person or not. You can be a glass half empty kind of human or one that is more glass half full, and either way, be impacted by shit going on around you. You may not be impacted in the same way. You may or may not get stuck. Either way, you can still feel the direct or ripple effect of some thing. 

Truly, it doesn’t matter who you are or how you function in the world. You may respond to a situation like a total rock star or you may typically get toppled by everything. Either way, a tidal wave is just that. It hits, often unexpectedly, and conquers most of what is in its path. That’s just how this stuff works. 

The little things that change you, do so in two primary ways, as follows: (i) they are the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back, or (ii) they can be very specific and pointed triggers. 

Let’s talk about each of these scenarios. Maybe you are involved in a relationship where you feel like you’re getting beaten down regularly and yet, you’ve managed to handle shit to date. You keep yourself together and you stay fast by that other human’s side. How? Why?

Sometimes we are able to tolerate certain behavior or situations for periods of time because we have breaks in between the behavior that troubles us. We work furiously during the down or off time to make sure that we are able to talk ourselves back into the thing that got us all riled up. Sometimes it’s a means to an end situation for us and so we cling to the idea of something. Sometimes we are just too damn scared to contemplate the alternative and what that means.  I’ve discussed these avoidance and rationalizing exercises before so I don’t think I need to get too crazy right now, do I? 

Anyway, there we are, going along our merry path, and bam. That one thing happens and we can’t undo it or pretend like it didn’t happen or get over it. Even if we get over it temporarily, we are incapable of putting it behind us entirely. We fixate and obsess and dwell. We suffer. And so, we have no choice but to recognize the impact of a thing. We have just suffered too much abuse prior to that moment or experienced too much pain and while we didn’t make a decision to move a mountain, our heart or mind (or both) did the work for us. Enough is enough it (or they) screamed. You might try and resist this shift at first. All the reasons you fought getting to this point will float right up to the surface. Alas, it’s too late and it’s in the hands of a higher power now. Your wall has been breached and you can’t do anything except decide how you are going to handle what comes next. 

That’s the breaking point scenario. The straw. What about the other? What about when there’s that one thing that happens that lights you up? Even that bit is broken up into two distinct parts, where I’m concerned. There are the things that you know make you crazy and as such, you’ve likely shared them with your circle. Alternatively, there are those things that you didn’t know made you nuts until, well, they do.

I’m sure you’ve experienced both of these scenarios in some way, or in your own way. It’s incredibly personal so there’s nothing prescribed I can offer you. I can, however, give you some examples so that you get the gist. Nothing hurtful bout a little same page action, right? 

Okay, so let’s use benign-ish examples. You despise people who don’t run on time. You make it known that this is an itch you can’t scratch. Your significant other is late for something important and voila, you lose your shit. You don’t realize that someone apologizing over and over again (seemingly without meaning) pisses you off but then it happens, over and over again and you freak out. Truly. Meltdown central. 

There doesn’t need to be a rhyme or reason behind what makes you tick. It’s your jam. So yeah, your unraveling is going to be very personal and unique. It’s the seeing it that matters. Eyes wide open. Really looking inside yourself and giving yourself permission to feel what you feel at any given moment. 

You will likely try and talk yourself out of your feelings if the source is perceived to be nonsensical or smaller by general standards. Or you will feel compelled to make it bigger so that the people around you agree with your response and reaction. None of that needs to happen. You can feel what you feel just because. Your beach looks darker today because you didn’t have that white paint in your paintbox. Nbd. You’ll survive. 

You can love your creation as is, you can want it to be different and work on that, or you can even be grumpy as fuck. The world is your strangely colored oyster (see what I did there?). 

Talk tomorrow…

L.