I’ve been a bit MIA. That’s the truth. I know it. It’s happened before, with good reason. Or anyway, with my reasons. And, I have my reasons. On one hand, I’ve been having fun. That’s not to say that my fun can’t include writing, because it usually does, but in this case, I’ve been running around and also, occasionally acting as hostess. While I can be socially inept, there’s something particularly sordid about the idea of dipping out of plans I’ve made, whilst I’m hosting, to write for a bit.
I mean, don’t put it past me, because I did banish a playdate companion as a child for not reading with me. Yes, you read that right. Danielle didn’t read and therefore, I had no use for her. Right about now, I imagine you are asking yourself what kind of a child wants to read on a play date. Well, duh. One who loves reading. Also, one who has some social issues, or at a minimum, a heaping dose of introversion.
Anyway, I have been having fun, and that’s been good, because if I sit still for too long and think about the state of the world, my heart nearly falls right out of my chest. Truly. I feel so unbearably bogged down by the inhumanity and hatred and strife and fighting, that when I give it more than a moment’s thought, I feel my insides churn.
That is not to say that I don’t think about these things or try to avoid them. Because I don’t. At all. In fact, I’ve tried to really educate myself in the last few weeks. I’ve tried to really listen and learn and process. This, of course, is a revolutionary and unique notion today, because it seems like as a general rule our society loves nothing more than formulating opinions much like my dad creates spectacular meals. It goes something like this: reach for what’s in front of you, act in an impulsive or whimsical fashion, don’t worry about remembering anything or providing rationale, and demand that those you share the meal with never question you, ever.
Hang on one moment, because I feel like I should clarify, in case the description confused anyone. My father is an incredible chef. His creations are amazing, and I often wish there was something more actual behind his recipes so I could endeavor to reproduce at some point in my existence. I was attempting a metaphor. That’s all.
We are assaulted with headlines. Those headlines depend, sadly, on the outlet or source we are partial to. Of course, there is very little real, unbiased news today for a variety of reasons (mostly because the news became a profit center some years ago), and so, our chosen source has their own opinion/slant/take. Sometimes, we don’t even bother going beyond the headline, and this is a fantastic result for the source. They’ve drawn our attention and there’s very little accountability with respect to anything that comes next. Like, um, facts, support, and evidence.
I mean, some of us will dive below the covers, but that exercise is naturally steeped in our own biases and painted with the specific color palette selected by the source. Also, that dive is often pretty shallow. It’s more like a toe dipping exercise. And this is because we’ve become such an instant gratification group. We want information and we want it quickly and if we can’t get it speedily, then we’ll create our own pace and absorb whatever can seep in during that abbreviated period.
So, we’ve info grabbed. And then we take that information, which is already half tainted, and we mix it up with all the other shit we are hearing around us, and what we think we know about things, and then also, our mood that day. And then, what do we do next? We put our not-so-carefully constructed opinion online. But we don’t also clarify that it’s our opinion and mostly based on fluff and dust. Oh no, we’re sharing facts. Real, hard facts. And they are presented through the use of a carefully curated meme that we’ve created or that we’ve stolen from a creator who shares our same thoughts.
There is no room to grow or learn or understand things from a different perspective. There is no understanding. There is none of that. We condemn, celebrate, fight, and judge based on what we have decided we know, and there is no room in the cup for even one more drop. Not a single one.
Holy fuck that scares me. It really does. Because here’s the thing- I think that’s a mistake that we keep making and it’s costing us dearly. I can’t understand why the fuck anyone voted for the hate mongering toad that is Trump, but also, I do understand, because I took a beat and decided that I had to. I didn’t have to agree. I don’t have to make sense of it. But I have to get it if I want things to change.
There is irrational behavior. There is hate for the sake of hate. There is little to no understanding required there in my humble opinion. Although, if we are getting real, real, there are generational traumas that usually create and perpetuate those paradigms too. In other words, much as we are loathe to admit it, there are literally reasons for everything. That said, I can totally get on board with the outright condemnation of hate mongers and murderers. Full stop.
It’s the rest of it that perplexes me. It’s the notion that we can understand everything by looking at a few Instagram posts. It’s the idea that just because we want to believe something, it has to be true. It’s the thought that we never have room to change our minds about anything or that changing one’s mind is a sign of weakness. It’s not. I’ll tell you what it is a sign of- HUMANITY. We are humans. In a perfect world, one that doesn’t cause me endless agita, we would endlessly evolve (instead of the devolving I seem to be witnessing). We would seek to understand the sides we don’t agree with (please don’t come at me- I am not talking about a heart to heart with terrorists) so that we can better fortify our argument or maybe, the horror, have a different point of view.
We can even have compassion for the pain and suffering of others when we don’t agree with them or their particular view on the world.
That’s fucking humanity, my friends.
Inhumanity? Hate for the sake of hate. Opinions that are parading as fact. An unwillingness to learn and grow. Wishing harm upon others just because you don’t understand them. Using a terrible time as an opportunity to be glib or condescending or relentlessly educational in the way that leaves no room for discussion.
Yeah. I’ve been a little pissed off and a lot sad and also, desiring of more information.
I can tell you this- I’m really fucking sorry that people are dying right now for no good fucking reason. Because yeah, it IS no good fucking reason. Fighting? Okay. Dying? No. No. No. Period. End of story.
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