The Power of Words.

I got stuck in a social media hole last night. My mind was restless and even though I’ve sort of sworn it off, I did find myself pre-slumber doom scrolling. I somehow landed on an influencer’s video who was offering an apology for misinformed statements she made in connection with the Hamas-Palestinian-Israeli conflict. Before you think I’m going to jump into that topic [again], let me correct your misconception. I’m not. Not really.

Rather, I want to address two thoughts/facts that relentlessly assaulted my brain as a result of watching that video:

1. This influencer was owning up to the fact that she didn’t have a substantial amount of reliable information accessible when she used her fairly sizable platform to voice strong and polarizing statements about the conflict, the people involved, and women around the world, generally.
2. She also admitted that she had been receiving death threats online and very tentatively shared that no matter her wrongdoing, she didn’t think threats on her life were warranted.

A few other thoughts occurred to me (or questions) while I was pondering the above two points. First of all- did it take receiving death threats for her to take a pause and consider the power and meaning and influence of her words and statements? Secondly- what kind of a fucking lunatic decided that a death threat was a reasonable response to a differing (albeit ignorant) point of view? Also, would those offering death threats as a response to unfavorable opinions be comfortable doing so in real time? Or are they emboldened by the electronic separation and anonymity that exists when an exchange occurs via social media?

All of these questions and thoughts point to one, all-encompassing perspective where I’m concerned, as follows: We’ve completely lost the notion of the power of our words. Well, either that, or we’ve completely lost our minds, or both. I could, I’m aware, offer some disclaimer at this point that acknowledges the complicated factors involved in what is going on in the world. I could speak to the sensitivities and elements and the vast amount of misinformation and of course, the fear, for so many. We know all that though, don’t we? Don’t we already know all of this?

Maybe we don’t and a reminder is needed. This issue is super fucking complicated. It spans decades and is as treacherous as these things get. Land. Theology. Ideology. Violence. All of it. I’ve read more than I’m going to discuss here, and I’m still far from informed. And I know that. I know what I don’t know, which is almost everything. I know that I never think a solution to anything is violence or death. Ever. Outside of that, I’m not interested in sharing my view or educating anyone using the contents of this post because I don’t think it’s my place and more than that, I’m not informed enough to do anything than share my half-informed opinions and feelings.

I do want to be clear that I think people should be free to share their thoughts or opinions (with carve outs like racism, inciting violence, etc.). I believe wholeheartedly in the freedom of speech and expression. That said, I think with that right comes a responsibility. An awareness. An understanding that once thoughts and feelings and words are put out into the world, they have the ability to impact, to shape, to bring joy, to provoke rage. Even with an understanding of audience, we can never really fully predict the impact of sharing. So, doesn’t it behoove us to thoughtfully consider the potential impact before we open our mouths?

I am not talking about self-censorship or holding one’s tongue. What I’m talking about is consideration. What I’m talking about is sensitivity. What I’m talking about is awareness.

My mom has said many, many times in my life that never is never right and always is always wrong. What does that mean? Well, when you make generalizing statements, you are likely missing the mark. There is usually going to be a carve-out. There is usually going to be some bit of information that renders a particular statement inaccurate or inappropriate. That doesn’t mean that the statement shouldn’t be made, but is it terrible to consider making that statement with the acknowledgement that It may not be applicable to every time, everything, everywhere and every person?

That said, I’ve seen people make some pretty horrifying, ill-informed statements on rather significant platforms and I’ve never, ever felt compelled to lash out at them, making them feel attacked or unsafe. Typically, I’ll just scroll. Once in a blue moon, I’ll send a direct message and gently suggest that they check their source material. Sometimes I’ll even unfollow.

I am not in any way downplaying the anger and grief that is connected to what is going on in the world right now, but I’d like to understand how destroying each other is helpful. I would like to understand who benefits when we criticize and threaten those who don’t share our views and opinions. I would like someone to explain to me when we became a society that has no couth, no respect, and no boundaries. Because we don’t, have boundaries.

I want to explain that this is not just limited to what’s going on in the Middle East. Not even close. I belong to a park/hiking group online that I decided to unsubscribe from this morning. Why? Well, a woman posted pictures of a local park and the foliage and got destroyed. They thought her dog was off-leash, they thought the foliage was better in weeks prior, and they thought her photo angles left something to be desired. Complete insanity. Like just keep scrolling. Why do you feel compelled to comment publicly? Even if you have an issue, like with her dog, perhaps you could private message and just remind that there are rules in the park? Or maybe just let those who are with her IN the park deal with it? Or maybe, just be nice? By the way, if her dog was off-leash or if she took terrible photos, does that warrant an attack?

Because it was, an attack. One person wrote and then several others piled on. It was gross. It made my stomach hurt. The same way I felt when the influencer was talking about death threats she had received. We’ve turned completely mental. And self-absorbed.

There is a balance here, and I recognize it’s not always easy, but I still think that we can do better, right? Like, we can avoid threatening someone’s life because we don’t agree with them. I’m sure of that. We can decide to educate ourselves a bit before we carelessly share strong opinions with a large audience, right? The argument used for free speech lately is the same that’s being used for other rights, and honestly, it’s scaring me. Just because you have a right, doesn’t mean that right should be unequivocal and boundless. We are human. There is nuance. There are facts and feelings to consider.

But really, can’t we – JUST. BE. NICE?!

I don’t think we are solving the world’s MASSIVE problems by tearing each other to shreds, right?

X

L.